More Slidell family! Some of my best and worst years were lived in Slidell and New Orleans (more about the worst in the next post). I think God was very purposeful to allow me to live some of the worst years in Slidell. Never in the years that I’ve lived yet did I have so many wiser adults, couples, and families taking me under their wings and inviting me into their families. God knew I would need them to be my family. He knew there was no better group of people for me to lean on as I learned how to allow the Church to be my family and fill in all the gaps of broken family relationships. He knew these people needed to be surrounding me as I finally understood that someone loving you even when they don’t have to (chosen family) is as equally (and sometimes more) valuable as someone loving you because they are supposed to (blood family). In addition to so many of the other Slidell people mentioned (TWU, The Palmers) and more, Rosemary and The Ogeas are irreplaceable parts of my chosen family.

Rosemary, known by Roe to many of those who love her, is another one of those incredible spiritual mothers I’ve been blessed to know. This beautiful lady loved/loves me and so many others so fiercely. She is gentle, kind, compassionate, loving, funny, talented, wise, giving, and so many other things. She’s an amazing cook. She’s a savvy business woman. She’s incredibly healthy in all aspects of her life. She’s an amazing wife and mother. She displays so many characteristics of the Proverbs 31 woman – more precious than jewels, a trustworthy heart, strong, opens her hand to the poor, reaches out to the needy, strength and dignity are her clothing, she opens her mouth with wisdom, the teaching of kindness is on her tongue, she looks well to the ways of her household, she doesn’t eat the bread of idleness, and she reverently fears the Lord. She has such an incredible testimony and her love for Jesus is so real.

She took me in like I was her very own daughter! When I didn’t have a place to go for Christmas, she insisted I stay with her, bought me undeserving gifts, and showered me with love. She loved me in my brokenness and heartache. When I needed something, whether it was a counselor or a place to live or a bed and furniture for the places she helped me find to live, she did everything in her power to help me find everything I needed! She prayed for me and every need I have and then watched God provide just like she knew He would. She has an amazing ability to connect with broken people and I watched her do it over and over again. As I watched her live her life with abandon, I wanted to be like her. She spent time with Jesus everyday, rising many hours before the sun came up to pour her heart out in prayer and cling to God’s written word (and though I don’t see her daily life anymore I have no doubt that she still does this). She went to bed early and frequently couldn’t make it past 9. I loved that about her, and I knew she experienced Jesus in a way I didn’t. Frequently in those days I stayed up way later than anyone should, therefore clinging to every extra minute of sleep I could, and had many a conversation with her where I told her I wished I could be a morning person like her. She always told me I could, but I never believed her.

I now know that her ability to rise early and go to bed early had nothing to do with what I assumed it did. I do think as humans we lean more towards a time of day that we’re at our best, but I also think many of us night people use not being a morning person as an excuse. I now know, like she does, that there is absolutely nothing in life that is better than intimacy with Jesus. I now know there is obedience in giving our first fruits, the first part of our day, our first thoughts and affections and time, to our Heavenly Father before the rest of the world and it’s busy moments have time to distract us. I now know that rising early and going to bed early has far more to do with discipline and desperation for time with the Creator of the universe than it does being a morning person. Spiritual disciplines aren’t called DISCIPLINES because they are easy. Discipline is an ugly word. It’s a hard word. But the beauty of discipline is that before you even know it, even if the good thing you’re trying to obediently add to you life feels forced at first, it soon feels normal, necessary, life-giving, sustaining, and like you never want to live without it again. If spiritual disciplines came naturally then they wouldn’t be something every believer struggles with! But I now know, because I’ve watched people like Rosemary live it, and personally experienced it, that it’s worth it! It’s worth more than anything else. Spending time with your God, studying His word, praying, meditation, etc, is more valuable than anything you can have or experience. It doesn’t change God or our circumstances, it invites the Holy Spirit into our lives and changes us.

And the Ogeas! Andrew and Amy were two of the first people I met at our church other than Jason and Christie. Andrew is one of the most outgoing people I’ve ever met. He’s also one of the most amazing worship leaders and vocalists I’ve ever been lead by! And Amy is my sister! She’s beautiful, hilarious, an amazing mom, and will forever be one of my best friends. When I first met them none of the above pictured adorable kiddos were even in the picture yet. Amy and Andrew were (and still are) my people. Their spare bedroom was basically my room. We chaperoned youth trips together, we ate LOTS of meals together, we laughed endlessly together, and we watched a lot of Drake and Josh and Jonas Brothers together (okay that part was just me and Amy). And you know you’re really friends with someone when you can spend the night at their house on Christmas Eve. Not just any friend can do that! Around the time that I moved from New Orleans to Slidell, they moved from Slidell to New Orleans to serve at another church. Even though it was just a short lake (well, it’s actually a pretty big lake) away, I was so sad! I cried so much the day they told me. I quickly learned though that Amy and Andrew were on the list of forever friends. Forever friends aren’t thrown off course by distance, long gaps between talking, or anything life throws at them. I never doubt the love and loyalty of a forever friend.

I rejoiced when I found out Amy, Andrew, and Macy were moving back to Slidell! My forever friends got to be my every day friends again. I was literally at their apartment almost every day after work. We got to walk with each other and love each other through some of the hardest seasons we each had to walk through. They loved me in the midst of depression, anxiety, intense and hard counseling days, and more. I got to see them love each other amazingly and show me what a Godly marriage looks like  as they walked through a really hard season. I got to see the incredible power of redemption, freedom, accountability, and transparency displayed in their lives. For the first time in my life, I felt like I could be free of a sin stronghold because of their story. My hope was restored in the power and freedom of Christ. And then… God called me to move. And not just across the lake, but back to Mississippi! Amy, Andrew, Macy, and Rosemary were all a major part of the sole reason I didn’t want to leave Slidell – the people. Obviously you know from previous posts that I moved and that I was absolutely supposed to. My possessions have lived in Mississippi for 5 years now this month, but my heart has continued to live in Slidell and Mississippi.

These people (and all the others) are my forever friends, my chosen family, my people. They are in my heart forever along with the many things I have learned from them. I know that the the sweetest intimacy with Jesus comes from a life of discipline because of Roe. I’m a better minister to women and mentor to girls because of her. I know what forgiveness and unconditional love looks like because of Amy. One day I’ll be a better mom and wife because of the way I saw her live in those roles. I know what transparency, redemption, and authenticity looks like because of Andrew. I took the hard road of fighting through an entangling sin and inviting others to fight with me and found true freedom because I found hope in seeing him do it first. I’m a better version of myself because I get to call these people my friends.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

The Palmers are such a special family to me! They now live elsewhere (as do I), but they were part of the group of people I met in Slidell and went to church with there. They are the reason I went to church in Slidell to begin with! Jason was in a class with two of the aforementioned WACOHs, Amanda and Cheryl. He invited them to his church and they invited me (I think that’s how it went at least). I don’t even know if we visited another church after our first time at Northshore, it instantly felt like home and the Palmers had a lot to do with that! Christie and Jason took the three of us under their wings and became our home away from home. They invited us over for Sunday lunch almost every Sunday, had us over often during the week, and trusted us with their kids. We also got to be in their small group! There were several couples in different stages of life and the three of us – me, Amanda, and Cheryl, single seminary girls. Because of my time in that small group, the things I valued about small groups was forever changed. Being part of an intergenerational/life stage small group was SO life giving. I think segregated small groups can for sure serve so many great purposes (you know I love my college girls!). But I think so much happens when we all just do life together regardless of age, marital status, number and ages of kids and/or grandkids.

Jason and Christie live for the gospel in such a beautiful way. God truly is the center of everything they do. They are amazing parents and I hope and pray if I ever have kids that watching them parent rubbed off on me a little. They are so giving, so caring, and so open to everything God has for them and everywhere He takes them. And they give their all in everything they do! They both served, and I’m sure continue to serve, the Church in SO many ways. From worship team, to women’s ministry, to kids ministry, to set up team and leadership team, to everything in between, they served! And they weren’t just committee member, Sunday and Wednesday Jesus followers, they really lived it out every day in every way and invited people into their lives and to be part of their family. They prayed for us endlessly! And they really cared about every little and big thing we concerned ourselves with and were never too busy to make time for us. One semester they even let Amanda and I live in their house for a month or so. And oh the things they taught me!

They are the most organized people I’ve ever met, and if you know me, that’s saying a lot! My organization is minuscule in comparison to theirs. Jason has (or at least had) a spreadsheet where he kept up with his workouts for YEARS! Jason sat us all down one night and taught us how to budget. He created a template for us and showed us how to use it. I’m pretty sure I’d be homeless right now if it wasn’t for Jason teaching me how to budget. With a little shame I admit that prior to this valuable life lesson with Jason, my bank account was accustomed to seeing red and overdraft fees. I can count the number of times on ONE hand that I’ve overdrafted since then (7+ years ago!). I’ve also gotten to share different versions of that budget template with more friends than I can count! And Christie is the reason I meal plan. Yes, that thing I’m obsessed with now that I try to convince everyone to do. It all started with Christie. As passionate as Jason was about instilling in us the value of a budget, Christie was equally as passionate about how valuable meal planning is. I wrote a post a while back that summed up many of her reasons, and now my reasons – you can read it here (and some here too). She planned for a month at a time and taught me all the ends and outs of meal planning and grocery shopping on a budget. She’s saved me, and many of the others I’ve convinced to meal plan, so much money.

I read this on She Reads Truth last year and was overwhelmed to tears for all the spiritual mothers I’ve been blessed to know, and instantly had to send it to Christie, one of my many spiritual mothers.

“Technically, it was a Bible study. But we didn’t just study God’s word. She taught us how to study God’s word. And not only did she serve us good food. She set aside time at the end of each study to teach basic feed-a-family kitchen skills: how to plan and plant a garden, and that lilacs in bloom are for clipping and sharing, even if it means wrapping the cut stems in wet paper towels and driving them into town for a friend.

Karen was my spiritual mother.

She knew what Paul told Titus about older women training the younger women (Titus 2:3-5). She had nothing to gain, but gave several hours a week to teach us with her words and actions how to keep home, love our husbands and children, and honor the Lord with our words and actions.

No shame. Just kindness.

We are afraid to reach out—afraid to be rejected. Asking for and offering help can feel super vulnerable. You never know how someone is going to respond.

But Sisters, godly women-training-women is absolutely a risk worth taking, whether it looks like roasted chickens and gardening, or coffee dates and spin class. Expect that blessings will follow!”

My life was blessed because of the way Jason and Christie poured in to me. They poured into me spiritually and with all kinds of life-bettering skills. I’m a better human being and WAY more responsible because of the ways they loved me. Christie is still at the top of the list of the people I go to when I am burdened to invite my village to pray with me (something I know I should do more), and I KNOW when I ask without a doubt that her and Jason really do pray. Pouring into a younger generation isn’t as scary to me as I imagine it would be if I hadn’t seen it modeled so beautifully with no complicated frills or titles, just life on life, by Christie and Jason and so many others. I will forever be thankful for the things they taught me, prayers they prayed (and continue to pray) over me, and for the ways they loved me and showed me how to love others and give myself away.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

Today I’m going to talk about my blogger friends! Clearly the blogging community has had an impact on me. Aside from Jesus, nothing inspires my writing like fellow bloggers/writers. They make me laugh, they make me cry, they make me want to buy things, they make me hungry, they influence my fashion choices, cooking choices, meal planning, and more. Some of them know me, most of them don’t, but dear blogging friends, I see you. You are real writers whether you think you are or not. Your words matter whether they are few or many. You are brave and you do big things. I know how scary (and exhilarating) it is to press that publish button and have your words and heart out there for the world to see. You inspire me and I’m glad you share your words and thoughts and recipes and outfits with us.

Joy at Joy the Baker is my all time fav. I LOVE HER! I’m convinced we’re kindreds and would be friends in real life. She writes with humor that I get and love. She perfectly mixes real life and food into every post.

Annie at AnnieFDowns.com is also my kindred. We’d totes be friends. I have a DEEP love for women in their late 20s and beyond who are single, long for marriage, but know their lives are good and will be good whether marriage comes or not. Annie is on that list. And she loves Tim Riggins as much as I do.

Ree at The Pioneer Woman is everyone’s fav, but seriously she’s fantastic! Her show is great, but her blog and ability with words far surpass her show! She’s funny, witty, and does the real life food balance as magically as Joy does.

Jess at Meet the Magnolias really is my kindred, not just a wanna be kindred. She’s my real friend and she’s fantastic. She knows more about pop culture than anyone I know and has SO much love for life! We bond over our love for blogging, nail polish, fictional characters, and so much more.

EB at Benchpressing Buicks. You already heard about her in my RA post and know all the great things I think about her. Seriously, we’re gonna write a book together one day.

Brittany at Coffee, Puppies, and More Spiritual Things. I’ve given Brittany her own post and shout outs everywhere (see OWLs, RDs, and Starbucks Lovers). I won’t say more, but she’s hilarious, candid, and real.

Sam at Our Journey is another real life friend! She lives in Texas now and I live in Mississippi. She might not even know that I read her blog, but I do, every time, and I LOVE her story and heart.

Jess at Life on Lawson is a real life person too. She’s a fantastic writer, has a beautiful heart, and an amazing story.

Kendi at Kendi Everyday is my go-to fashion blog! I can’t afford any of the stuff she actually wears, BUT she gives me outfit inspiration often (made up of much cheaper pieces of course).

Katie at A Place to Dwell is on the list of women who balance singleness and longing for marriage with such grace. Her bravery and love for life inspire me.

Nadine at Nadine Would Say is also on the aforementioned list! She’s so full of wisdom and depth and I love reading her posts.

Callie at From the Corners of the Curve is my favorite plus size fashion blogger! She’s British and super fun to follow on Snapchat.

Bronie at Team Victory is one of my TWU ladies! Team Victory is her former blog, no longer active but the posts are still there and worthy of reading! I started reading her blog right around the time I started my own. Her wit and the way she learned lessons from all the happenings of real life inspired me so much! She’s an amazing writer and I’m convinced one day I’ll get to read her book (and maybe even get to write a book with her).

G at Nouveau Cheap is the ultimate/best beauty on a budget blogger! She posts sales on beauty products and has made me spend lots of money/saved me lots of money.

Kristin at The Beauty Department is my forever hair crush! She’s a celebrity hair stylist and helps run a fantastic beauty blog.

JJ at Always in Joy is a another real life friend! She previously had another blog I LOVED as well and talked about crafty things. Her new blog chronicles her current journey in life and it’s so beautifully transparent and encouraging.

Jenny at Jenny Bakes is a social media friend turned real friend! She’s my go-to person for cooking tips and recipes. I always joke that I wish I had an “Ask Jenny” app. She’s also one of the smartest people I know and her intelligence inspires me!

Gina at Skinnytaste is my go-to blog for healthy recipes! I make most of my recipes “skinny” based on tips and tricks I’ve learned from her. Every recipe I’ve cooked from her blog has been fantastic and fail proof.

I could go on and on with lists of the people I love and follow (for real, I follow 200+ blogs on Feedly). But seriously blogging friends, you inspire me. You motivate me. You impress me. Believe in your abilities and talents! Believe that your words matter. Believe that you have the ability to influence others positivity. Believe that it’s okay to write just for you and because you like doing it. Stop comparing yourself to other writers. We’re all in this together! No one else’s success threatens our own. Write YOUR words. Don’t hold back. Don’t put yourself in a box. If you want to have a food blog and spend 31+ days not talking about food, do it! Don’t worry about your pictures not being perfect enough or your words not being witty enough. YOU (and your words) ARE ENOUGH! Comparison is the thief of joy. Writing should bring you joy! Don’t let the nasty comparison beast still your joy and your words. Obviously don’t write mean things about people or anything like that, BUT WRITE! Make time for the thing you love. Believe you deserve that! I see you. I get you. I appreciate you.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

This group of people gathered together for a shorter time in my life than most, but had a big impact and filled a big void at the time! Once Britt and I finally became friends, she realized she had several girls in her life who were all in similar life stages and of similar age that were frequently surrounded by students 8-10 years younger than them. In some way or another we all got paid to hang out with students who frequently compared their life stages to our own, and there really is a big difference! We all had other adult friends, but we all lived in a world of being mistaken for and compared to students. She realized we all had a need to feel like someone understood us and our lives. She decided we should all be friends and made us hang out once a week. 
We called ourselves/our group the OWLs – Older Wiser Ladies. I was instantly in based on the name alone, but I’m super glad I said yes to potentially awkward social interactions that ended up not being awkward at all! We’d plan random potluck style meals each week that frequently stressed me out because I plan in advance and Britt plans the day of, but it was good for me and always came together somehow. We ate and talked and gathered together to feel understood. We’d talk about what we were struggling with and what things we needed to believe and be reminded of. We’d speak truth over one another and into our struggles. And then we prayed, really prayed for each other and our needs and struggles and confusion. It was genuinely beautiful and something I so desperately needed in that season of life! We’ve dispersed now and most of us live in other places, but they all hold a special place in my heart as we continue to embark on similar journeys.

You know plenty about Britt already so I won’t talk more about her, but there was also Christy, Chaeli, and Tina. Tina was an equestrian coach at MC, daily surrounded by students, and a California transplant. She was always positive, brought a unique perspective, and inspired us all in how she really did love her job and students so much! Chaeli worked in the international office and taught English to students from other countries. She was always full of wisdom when we talked, always searching for depth in everything, and had an unmatchable gift with international students. I also got to live with her for a couple of months and now live in her old house! She taught me SO much about paying attention to where food comes from, gardening, farmer’s markets, and I have so much more knowledge about what’s in the food we eat because of her. Christy still lives in Clinton! She works at the coffee shop frequented my college students galore. She is a free spirit, loves Harry Potter as much as I do, has the brightest smile, a huge heart, enormous love for the Church, and I just love being around her. We really are going to start being better soon about hanging out!

I will forever be thankful for my time with the O.W.L.s and a season filled with the intentionality to pray boldly and specifically and watch God answer those prayers and guide my steps and the steps of those around me.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

It’s been a few too many days, it’s not even October anymore, blah blah blah I know I know! But like I said, despite any amount of excuses I could come up with, I’M DETERMINED TO FINISH THIS LIFE-CHANGING CHALLENGE! It’s been admittedly hard to get back to it, but I’m at my best writing place, drinking the biggest holiday beverage I could get with my free reward (caramel brûlée frapp to be exact), and listening to my 300 song strong Spotify Christmas playlist. If that isn’t the best mise en place for writing then I don’t know what is (and yes I know mise en place is a French cooking term, but if there is anywhere it can be used for writing too it’s on a food-ish blog right?). Okay so on to day 22.

You know I went to MC, met my two best friends (Micki and Molly) there, that the amazing Friendgroup full of more best friends was formed there, then I worked there and had the best job ever with the best people ever getting to love on more of the best people ever, and now get to feed and love on more great people mostly from there. I’ve talked about MC a lot, and I do love it and am a PROUD alumni and continue to wear blue and gold at every opportunity, but all of the seasons of life where I made the most connections and developed the most as a leader happened at MC and therefore I have a lot to say about it!

A little more about MC in case you didn’t go there so you can understand the group I’m talking about today. MC is the largest private university in the state! It has a social system similar to the Greek sorority/fraternity system, but governed by it’s on rules and people vs the greek panhellenic council. For lack of a better word, KT (and the other girl groups CT, NT, ST, and LT) is a sorority. MC, home Choctaws, calls them tribes (hence the T of the KT, CT, etc) for girls and clubs for guys. It’s not a sorority, but it’s sorority-like. There’s rush, follies, pledging, squeal day (greek pledge day), rush parties (we call them coke parties, as in Coca Cola), crush parties, grab-a-dates, sisterhoods, swaps, formals, informals, pins, colors, mascots, letters, etc. The main difference from sororities is that there is no bidding. You get to pick the tribe you want to be in. On pref day (I think it’s called bid day in greek world) you get a card and you write your prefs, 1st – 5th. Most girls get their 1st, especially this past year since they’ve raised the cap. But once one fills up they go down the line of prefs to place people. It’s a pretty fair process for something that has the potential to seem unfair. The girls are Kissimee (mine), Chenoa, Swannanoa, Nenamoosha, and Laguna. The guys are Shawreth, Civitan, Rotaract, Kokoa, and Circle K.

As a college transfer to MC, rushing wasn’t on my priority list. I was a little weird in college to say the least. I wore skirts over jeans, had a different color hair every other week, wore wristbands as bracelets, and was REALLY into indie music. The whole Friendgroup was rushing, but I didn’t feel pressured to do so and was completely content with being an “independent” as they call it. A great equally as quirky friend I met encouraged me to pray about it and not just make a decision based on thinking the tribe scene wasn’t for me. I decided to actually do that, and the more I prayed, the more I genuinely felt God leading me to rush. And not just to rush, but to pref a different tribe than all my friends, one that barely had 12 members while the others had 100+. Every other pledge class that year had around 40-50 girls. We had 5 and only 2 of those (myself included) spoke English fluently. We won 3rd place in follies (skits that each pledge class perform during Homecoming) that year out of 7 other groups!

During my 3 years in KT I held at least 7 offices. I was follies rep for our pledge class, spirit chair, chaplain, socials and swaps chair, formal and informal chair, vice president, and president. If you’re at least as good at math as I am (which is not good at all), yes, that means I held multiple offices at once! Most of us did. I don’t think they even let you do that anymore, but we had to! My KT sisters and I were active in what I like to call the rebuilding years (plus many years before and after us). When I was a VP, we went before the intertribal council to ask for 2 things. 1. Permission to go before the other tribes and ask their members to help save Kissimee the same way Kissimee once helped save the other tribes. This was VERY humbling and difficult to do as you could imagine! (Part of the known history of the social tribes is that in the beginning, 50+ years ago, there was just 1 girls social club. They decided to make 4. That first year KT got most of the girls. KT asked their girls to disperse themselves among the other tribes to help them all grow.) 2. We asked intertribal to lower the cap number. We knew this meant we’d get a lot of 3rd and 4th pref girls (squeal days squeals weren’t always happy squeals for many of those rebuilding years), but we also knew many of them (not all, but many) would realize they loved KT and stay! People are attracted to numbers, and we needed those numbers to grow. The girls after us continued the HARD work of helping KT grow. Somewhere along the way a saying was established that rings perfectly true, “You don’t choose Kissimee, Kissimee chooses you.” KT chose me and a whole bunch of other amazing girls that I got to serve and lead and lead with and it kept choosing amazing girls for years and years after us and it’s still choosing people today (AND THEY ARE THRIVING, well beyond any size we could have ever imagined in my day!).

I’m thankful for KT for SO many reasons. I learned so much about being a leader and leadership because of my time as an officer. I learned so much about being organized, about confidence while speaking to a crowd, about communication, about healthy confrontation and conflict, about managing/supervising people, and about loving people well! I slowly felt my heart being tugged towards women’s ministry for the first time because of my time in KT! I LOVED those girls so much. I still love them and adore meeting the new girls. I love the history, I love the memories, I love the traditions, I love all the beautiful cheesiness of sisterhood. It’s just a beautiful world! And I love seeing KT girls (and guys) new and old out and about, but there are 2 friends who’ve continued to stick with me pretty regularly over the years!

Jess! We were the 2 English speakers in our pledge class. Obviously we bonded quickly, but our friendship has been going strong since! We’ve been roommates three times – a semester in college, for the 6 months between graduating college and going to seminary, and her parents super graciously let me come live with them and her when I was displaced after leaving seminary. She visits me at least once or twice a year and it’s always fun. Last year we went to Harry Potter world together, which obviously you know I loved! Her family always welcomes me with open arms and treats me like one of their own. Jess and I can yell at each other and it’s totally normal. We’ve both been there for each other through some of our toughest times. She’s sarcastic, hilarious, real, and without a doubt I know she’ll always be my friend no matter how long we go between talking. And she’s coming to visit this month!

And my big sis Laura! There were several years where we didn’t do the best job at keeping in touch (probably my fault), but for the last 2 years we’ve reconnected and I’ve loved it! We live in the same place again, currently work at the same college (but in different offices), get to chat on office instant messager almost everyday, and semi-regularly eat lunch together (slacking lately, need to find more gluten free friendly lunching options for her that I actually like eating, oops). She is and has always been so bubbly and fun and was the best big sis a girl could ask for! She has a heart for orphans and the nations, loves elephants and golden retrievers more than anyone I know, and never gives up no matter what life throws at her.

I’m thankful for these people and so many more, the memories, the experiences, the leaderships skills gained, the sisterhood, the pink, the elephants, and that Kissimee chose me.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

Oh hey. I haven’t posted in 5 days (last Thursday). Oops. Life really was insanely busy. Friday I rushed home from work, grabbed dinner, made myself presentable, was on my way to Homecoming festivities by 6:30, and didn’t get home until after 10:30. Saturday I was up by 8, celebrating Hazel’s birthday (with an amazing DONUT birthday party) until past noon, my brother and uncle delivered firewood for my firepit at 12:30 and stayed for a while, the new roommates starting moving in at 1:30, and then we had friends over until almost 11. Sunday there was gospel family, grocery shopping, lunch, DIY makeup wipe making, weekly breakfast prep, baking 3 batches of cookies, dinner, Bible study, and BED. I was on such a roll, and now I’m struggling to find my writing mojo again and my house being so full of so many fantastic people that I want to hang out with doesn’t help (yay for new roommates and the preexisting roommate!) But I am DETERMINED to finish this challenge regardless of how many days of it get posted in November! Also, fun spoiler alert with a more in depth update coming at the end of this process – I’m now exploring writing more in different realms on the side, trying to actually get some printed published works out there (in magazines and newspapers), attempting to build my writing portfolio so writing as a job could possibly be part of my future, AND am meeting with a publication TODAY (Wednesday 10/28) I might be potentially writing for semi-regularly! AHHHHH! Okay okay, on to the people(s)!

In the 3 1/2 years I worked at MC I was privileged to supervise a total of 20 beautiful RAs – 6 to 7 a year. These girls! This job! The role I got to play in their lives! The role they played in mine! I could genuinely write a post about each and everyone of them. I’ll try to keep it brief for the sake of not writing a book in one singular post and only say lots of words about the ones that I now get to call friends in real life, not just work life, but I LOVE THESE LADIES! Every year I thought there was no way it could get any better, but some how it did every time. No staff in particular out shined any other staff, but they were all uniquely wonderful!

My very first staff! Leah Frances, EB, Kristen, Amanda, Mary Katherine, and Katie. I came in half way through the year after they’d already been doing RA life for a semester and knew WAY more about my job than I did. There could have been no better staff for a first year RD who had NO idea what the heck she was doing. They were hilarious, hard working, SO helpful, hungered to know Jesus more and deeply, and genuinely loved their residents. You’ve heard about Leah Frances! She’s Molly’s little sister and the reason I found out about this amazing job in the first place. I’ve known her since she was in 6th grade, and getting to be her boss, and then real friend, not just friends because of Molly, was an incredible journey (she was with me the next year too when we all got to watch her fall in love and then I got to stand with her on her wedding day!). In addition to being the fantastic person I already knew her to be, she was GREAT at her job and such an amazing leader on campus. Katie is a genius, did everything with excellence, and kept us grounded. Amanda is HILARIOUS, always brought the laughter, and so relateable. Kristen is a ninja, literally, she did karate, but also figuratively! She chased down a boy she found in our building once half way across campus until he fell and then she felt sorry for him and just let him go (I would have done the same, except I wouldn’t have actually chased him haha). Mary Katherine is wise beyond her years, had such a depth to her that most students don’t, and was so easy going. And I’m gonna talk about EB in the next paragraph since half of these girls (LF, Kristen, and EB) came back to me so that paragraph doesn’t look wimpy!

Year 2! The first staff I got to interview and pick for myself. Leah Frances, EB, and Kristen came back and we added Rebecca, Erin, and Kayla. I fought to the death for my returners (just kidding, there was no death, and it wasn’t dramatic, but I was willing to fight to the death to keep them). EB! She’s a beautiful soul and we’re real life friends now and I LOVE that (though I’m sad she moved away from me and to Florida). We connected quickly because of similar family brokenness. She’s hilarious, SO wise, has a genuine love for Jesus that’s contagious, makes awesome jewelry, is an incredible writer (she has a blog too!), is so real and authentic, AND TOMORROW IS HER BIRTHDAY! I’m secretly convinced one day we’re going to write a book together or something. Seriously, RA turned friend to the MAX! She’s also the first person I saw face to face after I found out my dad died. She handled it like a champ and was the perfect person to be there in that moment. Kayla is another genius (a future doctor!) and connected with residents in unexpected ways. Rebecca has such a beautiful and tender heart, has a life and story that perfectly displays the Gospel, redemption, and freedom, and is the most fashionable person I know! Erin is adorably quirky, loves old people more than anyone I’ve ever known, and loves life in a contagious way.

I got to keep Rebecca and Erin for another year (I love returning RAs!) and gained Abby, Hanna, Mary Jayne, and Emily. Emily has a heart for nations, has awesome tattoos, and such a real love for Jesus. One of my best one-on-ones (meetings RAs and RDs get to have together every other week) ever was with Emily! Mary Jayne was an involved leader on campus, loves people so much, and has contagious joy. Abby is the most talented interior designer I’ve ever known, is HILARIOUS, so quirky, has contagious joy, and has an amazingly talented and beautiful family. Hanna is now one of my new roommates!!! RA turned friend turned roommate! She was one of the most intentional RAs I ever had, has beastly dicing skills (as in veggies), is hilariously snarky, has such a kind and tender heart, and it’s only been a few days but I already love living with her and her longtime roommate and bestie Shelby (who was basically an assistant RA). This staff had to stick with me during my hardest year, the year I lost my dad, and will forever hold a special place in my heart because of that. The day I found out my dad was gone, we had a staff Thanksgiving dinner planned AND staff Christmas card picture photo shoot (yep, I paid for my staff to have a photo shoot so we could send Christmas cards, it was AWESOME!). I needed to be surrounded by people I love that day and needed the happy distractions. I try not to have too many regrets, but one thing I do regret is how I unintentionally emotionally closed myself off from these girls as my grief manifested in different. I got to apologize to them at the end, which was beautiful. But if I could take back anything from my time as a RD, that would be it. But despite that, we had a BEAUTIFUL year and I LOVE THESE GIRLS! We were incredibly close. One night I will never forget for the rest of my life was our testimony night. It started around a fire at Abby’s parents house, and lasted way into the wee hours of the morning as we relocated to my apartment. The presence of God was SO real in our little circle as we all confessed things we’d never confessed before. I’m convinced angels were rejoicing in Heaven as chains were broken and freedom was found in those moments.

I got a complete new staff for my last go round and my biggest one of the bunch! Lauren (sister of EB), Jordan, Ashley, Chelsey, Jessa, Miriam, and Reagan. I probably had the healthiest boundaries with these girls, and it resulted in something absolutely beautiful. I found my gospel family this year, and really got to focus on mentoring, loving, and pouring into these girls vs expecting them to be my go-to friends. Bonus: we became friends anyway! It’s amazing how healthy boundaries make relationships flourish even more. These girls impressed the heck out of me. The biggest age gap of RD to RA happened with these beauties and the wisdom they possessed blew me away. I felt like I already knew Lauren because of EB so we connected quickly! A beautiful soul, so grounded, SO artistically talented, and so driven. Reagan is one of the funniest people I’ve ever met and she doesn’t even try to be. Her dry sense of humor had me giggling every time I was around her, she is ridiculously strong, and a TALENTED videographer. She’s going places. Miriam has SUCH a heart for people and loves them fiercely, she pours her life into a younger generation, and understands God and His word on a deeper level than most adults! Chelsey is wise beyond her years and mine! Seriously, this girl taught me more than I could have ever have taught her. She has a hunger and thirst for more of God unlike any I’ve ever seen. Jessa is way cooler than I’ve ever been or will ever be, has a sense of adventure that’s inspiring, is SO smart, and is probably going to be a thriving CEO or some fancy world-impacting business woman some day. Jordan’s love for Jesus, desire for knowing Him more, and hunger for life is contagious! I still get to hang out with Jordan and I LOVE that. Her story is incredible, she sees God’s hand in everything, and loves people with all she has. I get to hang out with Ashley still too! She’s a closet genius (she doesn’t like to tell people, but she is REALLY smart!), adorably fashionable, endearingly quirky, and so open to all the things God has for her.

ALL THE HEART EYES FOREVER for the life I got to live with these girls! I will seriously always look on my time in this role with such fondness. We had SO much fun (sleepovers, Netflix binge watching, dinner nights, hall events, game nights, etc etc) that it just seems wrong that I got paid to have so much fun! I thrived in this role like no other. I got to cook for them, organize calendars and teach them how to organize calendars, make organized meeting agendas that were appreciated by most, learn to be supervisor for the first time, realize how much I enjoy building and encourage a team, interview hundreds of people, and so much more. We studied the Bible together, we prayed for each other, we shared our stories over and over again, we experience freedom together, we walked through hard things together. It was beautiful. Being an RD to RAs changed me and I will forever be grateful for them and the time we spent together.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

Being a Resident Director was THE best job I’ve ever had. It was a job that I did not deserve to get and that was in every way possible ordained by God. I’ve seen the way they/we (when I was a we) interview people, the applications that stand out, the experience required. It made absolutely no sense for me to get a job as an RD other than the favor of God. I’ve already talked about the restoring power this job had for my ability to believe God could use me in ministry again as I got to do the ultimate version of women’s ministry living life with 100+ girls and mentoring 20+ RAs, I’ve told you about my love for pouring into a younger generation of women, you’ve met one of my fellow former RD’s Brittany, you’ll get to hear about the amazing RAs I got to love on soon, but today I get to tell you about my peers – fellow former RDs that I got to work with for 3 1/2 years.

RD life is unlike any other job life. A lot of times it didn’t feel like work at all and just felt like I was getting paid to have fun and live my life. It is definitely a job with a lifespan for most people though. As beautiful as it is, which is what I’m going to talk about most, it’s definitely a “for a season” type job. I think some people can successfully be called to it for long term! But I think the beauty of it is that so many people get to be called to it for a short time, learn incredible things about leadership and professionalism as they serve, and move on to future things as better employees, and humans, than they would have been without that season. People often ask why I left if it was my dream job, and the answer is simple and not simple. Simple answer, God said it was time to go. Not simple answer is that as I started to get older and realize the age gap between me and my students was continually growing, in a lot of ways I realized my healthiest life probably wasn’t trying to keep up anymore. Things happen when you get old! You need sleep, routine, sleep, a home with a little more boundaries, and sleep. I have absolutely no regrets or bad memories from being Resident Director. And I miss it! I’m happy and my life is amazing and I know I couldn’t host and be as involved in the lives of people closer to my age if I hadn’t moved on, so no regrets. But I say all that to say, I look back on my 3 1/2 years of RD life with nothing but fondness and only left because God said it was time, not for any bad reasons or on any bad terms.

Every year I worked there I got to work with some combination of 8-10 amazing people. I’m going to talk about many of them in a minute, but I want to share some of my favorite general memories first. I’m a Myers-Briggs ENFJ unwavering every single time. ENFJ’s thrive the most in work environments that involve working with a team. Working in the context of a team brought out the best in me! We challenged each other, we pushed each other, we had a blast, and we really loved each other and became a family. We met together weekly for staff meeting, which was always a blast, but beyond that we actually liked each other and became a solid community of adults living with college kids on campus. We watched each other grow, we saw each others potential, we beamed with pride when we saw one another be good at our jobs. Don’t get me wrong, there were hard parts! I still can’t explain how any RD (and Directors of Housing) survive training weeks other than some sort of supernatural adrenaline that kicks in. RDs train for a week, prepare for training RAs all summer, and then train RAs for two weeks. Three weeks of no-sleep, really fun, crazy busy exhausting training. The prep work that happens before a building can open is exhausting and physically intense. The work that has to happen to close down a building is even more exhausting and physically intense. And then there are on call nights/weeks! You are on call 24/7 on those days/weeks and any problem that happens in any residence hall on campus is your problem to fix and your fire to put out and then you have to fill out incident reports on all those problems and fires. And even when you aren’t on call, students and RAs can and will knock on your door way past working hours. BUT, it was beautiful. In the exhausting moments, sleep deprived hilarity often broke out. You don’t even want to stop or slack on your job when you have an amazing team working along side you, supporting one another to the core, and carrying each others burdens and weight when slacking moments did happen. We got paid to hang out with students, plan and attend events, and play sardines in empty buildings before students arrived. We got to watch our beautiful RAs grow into well rounded adults. We got to be the person they came to for advice. We got to love them and each other. My favorite moments ever year were at the beginning of the year and the end of the year. Three long, exhausting weeks of training always ended with a worship night for ResLife staff. We prayed over hiring them, we prayed for them all summer, and then we prayed prayers of commissioning over them for their new year with new students. At one of those worship nights, they turned it around on us. Those young, wise beyond their years college students wanted to pray for us! I will never forget that moment. And then at the end of the year we did cheesy, amazing things like having to pass around things with our names on them and our boss made us write encouraging things about one another. I still have every one of mine and CHERISH those words and every moment we got to live as a community of adults on campus together.

You’ve heard about Brittany already, but I have to mention a few others too. I LOVED them all, seriously I did, but some of these lovely people I got to work with for 2 and 3 years! It’s impossible not to leave a lasting impressive on someone when you operated as family together for that long. There were a few that I worked with for a super short time that made my very first semester to be thrown in as a Resident Director in the middle of a school year a lot less harder than it should have been. Beth worked there when I started. We worked together her very last semester of a long run of being an RD. I learned SO many things from her and wouldn’t have survived that first semester without her guidance and support. Heather started with me in the middle of the year! She was only there half a year, but she made me feel like I wasn’t alone in my newness, and that was invaluable. I only worked with Daniel for half a year too, but he was one of the most supportive and encouraging people I had ever met! That semester was the semester I was the most dedicated ever to weight loss. He was such a cheerleader for me in that journey and I appreciated it and needed that so much. Then the long timers like Britt! The first time I met Seth in his interview I knew we were going to be friends. We were the only two MC alum on our staff. Our love for our school and state ran deep! We basically strategically arranged things so our staffs would be friends so we could form what we called the alliance. We had smore nights, they provided us Sonic drinks and we provided them baked goods, and then we planned the most epic guy/girl collab residence hall event! Swing dancing + wings from Wingstop = Swingstop. It lived on past our time and we’re proud. Seth fiercely loves Jesus, is an amazing husband to Rebecca, and he’s pretty dang funny. Melony and I have a deep bond connected by hard past things no one should have to bond over but when you do it’s unbreakable! She’s ridiculously smart, wise beyond her years, the most amazing higher ed professional I know, and was the best RD I have ever seen. Melony is the type of person who makes you better at your job because you are inspired by the way she does her job! Her and Mike are the most perfect couple ever, and then there’s Kaiden! RD life is tight knit. We were there the day Melony announced she was pregnant, we were there literally almost every day Kaiden grew in her belly, present the day he was born, and there all through the first year of his life. We all got to be Kaiden’s family and it was beautiful and amazing! Trisha is the quirkiest and one of the most  hilarious people I’ve ever met. Once we decided as a staff to plan an event for Pi day and Trisha proudly proclaimed that we should dress like pie (because that’s common and easy to do?). Trisha is also one of my Gospel family people! They no longer live in Clinton, but she’ll always be family to me. I could go on and on about these people and others – Jonathan, Jess, Travis, Jared, Simon, Brooke, Julie, Billy, Carrie, etc. Seriously all such amazing people, all made me laugh, all challenged me and taught me things just by being who they were. And the fearless leader of us all was Sharia. The lady knows how to train and grown and develop people! She knows how to build a team. She knows how to think outside the box. My time at MC as a Resident Director really changed and shaped me into a better professional, leader, and human in SO many ways and so much of the credit for that goes to the amazing people I got to work with and do life with.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

So, sometimes when I’m lacking in the writing mojo I google quotes for whatever it is I want to talk about. Today I’m talking about coworkers, so I googled “coworker quotes.” As it turns out, not a lot of people have positive things to say about coworkers. This is indeed sad, and for sure we’ve all been there, but if you want a little chuckle do a google images or Pinterest search for coworker quotes, particularly SomeEcards ones. I can’t quote most of the things I read there here, but for kicks I have to share my favorite.

“Co-workers are like Christmas lights. They all hang together but half of them don’t work and the other half aren’t so bright.” 

I’d be lying if I said all my coworkers at my current job, or any job ever, all made me feel warm and fuzzy feelings. Facts are facts and you just connect with some people and don’t connect with others. I had a quite unpleasant day at work today, and though I’d take some satisfaction in complaining about that, the purpose of this post is to talk about the bright lights found at work. Another one of the facts of life is that sometimes work is just work. Sometimes it is just a means to an end called a paycheck. I think there are glorious days after working our tails off to do everything we can to chase dreams when the stars align and work doesn’t feel as work-like. But I think even when we have dream jobs, work-like days happen! The truth is, nothing – not a dream job, not a husband, not fancy things – can satisfy like Jesus. And this place isn’t our home. So we’re always going to long for home! And, if your work place is toxic, it’s okay to get out. It is. I promise! AND, work isn’t life. IT’S NOT! It’s one of the things you do so that you can live your life and pay bills and eat yummy food and hang out with friends and take care of your family, but IT IS NOT LIFE. But here’s what I also know, wherever we are, now and in the future, we are there for a season for a specific reason and there are people there who need to be loved! And there are people there who are pretty dang lovable if you take the time to see them that way. My former RD coworkers (super lovable peeps) will be getting there own post soon, but today I want to take the time to tell you about other coworkers past and mostly present, who are easy to love and make my work days more livable.

First a flash back to the past and my first “real” job! I was a social work case manager for a little over a year. It was pretty terrible and exhausting and not everyone I worked with was easy to love, but there was one bright light! We bonded over our love for fictional vampires (you know, as opposed to the real ones) and she looked out for me like no one else did. She invited me into her family and really saw me as a friend, not just a coworker. In that season of life, I needed a friend like that! We’ll call her C and I wouldn’t have survived that job without her.

Now to my current job! Things aren’t always rosy (when are they ever anywhere??), but there are some beautiful souls that I work with that I’ve grown quite fond of who have helped me survive in more ways than one. C was with me for the first year, but got married and left me! She was my first new work friend. We had so many things in common and bonded quickly. I’m sad she’s gone, but I’m so happy for her new adventures! K is a bright shining light! She can handle my tears, she’s funny, she’s always a listener, she genuinely cares about me and so many others, and she keeps things lively. She’s an amazing mom and incredibly smart. I kind of see her as my work big sister. She cares about my success and believes in me! S1 is so sassy and hilarious. She keeps everyone in line, she does WAY more than seems humanly possible, she is a force to be reckoned with, and if I had to fight a battle I’d want her on my team. She sometimes tries to pretend she doesn’t love us as much as we love her, but we all know she’s just hiding it. D is kind and gentle. She’s quite and calm. She manages way more things than I could imagine handling and does so with grace and no complaints! S2 is another workhorse! I have no idea how she balances all the things on her plate, but she does! She puts up with a lot, is always eager to learn new things, and let me teach her how to budget, which is one of my favorite things ever! F is so funny and endearing and has an incredible work ethic! She likes me way more than she should! She lost her mom recently and we’ve gotten to bond over the loss of a parent like only people who have grieved can. And then there are the Js. The Js are my hall mates and have looked out for me since day one! They are two of four men in an office of fifteen females! I like to secretly think of them as my work big brothers. They are calming presences, always even-keeled, protective, really smart, and I love working on their side of the building. J1 is unaffected by any problems that come his way, has such a beautiful family, is so down to earth, and is an impressive problem solver. J2 is talented, ridiculously smart, super witty, so kind to students, and an advocate for marginalized people.

I do my best to love all my coworkers. I challenge myself to pray for them and write notes and give happies. Even when work is just work, people still matter. People ALWAYS matter. I pray everyday that the Holy Spirit would give me supernatural motivation to do my job to the best of my ability, let me be a loving presence, let me make a difference in people’s lives, and do the hard work of reacting and loving and working like Jesus would. I don’t always succeed at all of those thing (or any of those things), but I’d like to think I do some days and that God is glorified by obedience and a heart that longs to do good.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

I’ve mentioned a couple of times that I feel most called to love on, encourage, and challenge other women. Through different seasons of my life, the group of girls I’ve gotten to love on has varied. As a young college student I spent almost every weekend teaching jr. high and high school girls at disciple nows. When I worked at summer camp, I spent summers guiding and taking care of a different set of 3rd – 6th grade girls every week. When I was an older college student at MC, I got to serve in several leadership roles (eventually president) for my sorority (MC calls them tribes, but for the sake of not having to explain that yet, we’re going to call it a sorority here), and genuinely felt called to those girls to love them and invest in them with all I had. When I was in seminary, I taught kids and helped with the youth group, but through baby sitting (and being friends with their parents) I built a relationship with some preteen girls from my church. They thought I was WAY cooler than I am (or every was). I hosted a sleepover for them at my apartment on campus in New Orleans. We baked and decorated cookies, we had debates on whether Hannah Montana or The Jonas Brothers were the best, and we had a blast.

As you heard in my TWU post, I went through a major rough patch of falsely believing God couldn’t use me in a ministry role in people’s lives anymore. I didn’t get to do life with or love on a group of girls for a while. I needed healing and to be loved on, so that’s okay. BUT, my life was a little less bright in that season. Not getting to do life with the group of people I felt most called to was a big part of the lack of light. I landed the job at MC where I got to LIVE in a dorm with 177 college girls and mentoring was written into my job description. DREAM JOB! To this day, I can think of no better way to rekindle a call to women’s ministry than getting to be the dorm mom of 177 college girls for 4 years. I absolutely loved every minute of it. (I didn’t love fire alarms in the middle of the night or on-call calls at 3 am, but you know, I loved MOST of it.) When I knew it was time for me to leave, I was terrified. I don’t like change, so some of it came from that. I didn’t know what I was going to do next, so fear there too, but my biggest fear was no longer having girls in my life to invest in and love on.

Right before I had to say goodbye to my last staff of RAs, I clearly felt the Holy Spirit give me some major comfort. I knew in that moment that when I had my own [rental] house, when students were back at MC (1/4th a mile from my house), and when I was working a new job where I wasn’t getting paid to invest in those girls, soon I’d get to shower them with love completely by choice! I’d get to invite them to a place that wasn’t the dorm, a home away from home. I’d get to cook a home cooked meal for them when they couldn’t handle one more day in the cafeteria. I’d get to be an older generation adult listening to them talk about their lives, caring what they had to say, loving them by choice, and gently imparting wisdom when the opportunities arose.

Right before the new school year started last fall, Lindsey and Anna arrived at our church as interns! One of those many previously mentioned mornings in Starbucks, I felt the Holy Spirit moving again! I was reminded of the promise that I’d get to love on college girls, and I clearly felt like I was supposed to invite Lindsey, Anna, and Sara in on this journey. They were all just as excited as I was! We met together all last year and started meeting together again this fall. We invite them to one of our houses every other week, cook homemade food for them, let them talk about anything and everything, occasionally throw in a boy to help lead a worship night, and really do offer a home away from home for them as they go through their college years. We aren’t another Bible study, we don’t require anything of them, they don’t have to go to our church, or any church. We just want to love them! The group is different this year than last year, but it’s perfect every time.

One of the girls’ parents thought we were a cult last year, which we got a kick out of. The same girl thought it would be funny to change our group message name to “The Coven.” Try not to look like a freak when you meet a new girl to invite to your group and try to explain why it’s called the coven? I’ve secretly in my mind been calling it The Guild lately, just so people don’t think we’re crazy. But guild is a fun word. It’s defined as, “an association of people for mutual aid or the pursuit of a common goal.” I’d like to think these girls know we are here to be at their aid at any given moment. And I know we have a common goal to pursue, to live lives that look increasingly more like the life of Jesus. Wintston Churchhill once said, “We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” Getting to give meals, space, campfires, a listening ear, gentle wisdom, encouragement, and love to younger generations of women – my guild – makes my life abundantly more lively and life-giving.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.

This was supposed to be one of those funny Saturday posts, but I’m behind so you get it on Sunday Monday instead! As you know, or should, I frequent Starbucks.  In fact, I’m sitting at one of my favorite tables in my favorite Starbucks right now. I’ve been frequenting the same Starbucks for at least 4-ish years. For the first year, I was mostly one of the drive-thru goers trying to earn my gold card spending a little too much money on fancy drinks. Back story: I used to HATE coffee back in early college days. I wanted to be a coffee drinker badly, so I worked my way into liking it first with frappuccinos and next by adding hot cocoa to my hot coffee. I now LOVE coffee in most forms. I still enjoy frappuccinos and fancy drinks, but my daily drink is simple and delicious – iced coffee, light ice, 2% milk. If I want some sweetness I add a pump or two of toffeenut (or pumpkin spice or caramel brûlée if they’re in season).

Because of my aforementioned friend Brittany, I soon discovered the beauty of being a Starbucks “regular.” Time with Jesus drew me to this place I love (serious thankful paragraph with more on that at the end), but the community of being a regular made it feel like a homey place which kept me coming back for more Jesus time, a go-to place to hang out with friends, a fix for my coffee addiction, the occasional Starbucks crush, and my favorite place to write. And so because I love this place, it’s community, it’s beverages, it’s beverage makers, and my fellow Starbucks Lovers, I must tell you about them as part of this 31 People(s) I love journey.

The baristas: As a 4 year vet, I’ve seen a lot of fancy coffee makers come and go, and I’ve loved, and not loved, many of the ones no longer with us! Two of those must be mentioned. Sy and Cliff. Sy is hands down my favorite barista ever. She was the first barista who ever memorized my orders! They do this I’m sure because it makes their job quicker, but having a barista know your order by heart is like when a cute baby you know calls you KK for the first time! It’s warm and fuzzy. Brittany, who literally insisted every barista and regular be her friend, became friends with Sy, and then coolest story, eventually got to baptize her! Sy always made the perfect drinks and became one of my friends and favorite people. She makes coffee in Atlanta now, but we miss her here. Cliff was another Brittany connection. She eventually convinced him to go to her church, and he was THE BEST! He encouraged our tattoo habits, occasionally sneaked me free drinks, and was the friendliest. Now my early morning coffee makers are Maddie (all the heart eyes, love her), Tasha (LOVE, and we share a love for PSLs), Brooke (more heart eyes), Jakel (we had a rocky start, but he was nice to me the other day and is an efficient drink maker), the cool girl with the tattoos (why can’t I remember names?!), Seth 2, and lots of recent new kids who are super sweet and great and whose names I have shamefully not learned yet! I occasionally go at night or in the afternoons and see more familiar faces like Seth 1 and Taylor. I am reminded from writing this that I need to commit their names to memory, geez, but they seriously make my mornings with their coffee making (duh), friendliness, morning pleasantries, the way they appreciate and take care of their regulars, and how they go above and beyond to remember drinks and make a business feel homey.

The regulars: Oh the regulars! I tend to be in my own world when I’m here and often put my headphones in and shut people out. Britt taught me a lot about being interruptable and taking the time to see these people as my neighbors. I used to be part of the 7:45 – 8:50 morning crowd, which is admittedly more active and awake. I’m now part of the 6:30 – 7:40 morning crowd. And then sometimes I’m part of the mid-morning – late afternoon Saturday crowd. A staple and one of my favs in the later morning crowd is Wheezy! She’s loved by ALL (Jakel LOVES here, and only tolerates most people), she wears horse shirts, brings her own mug, and I mean, her name is Wheezy (it’s on her license plate!). She has a spot. And if you are a regular, you just don’t sit in her spot and you try everything you can to save it for her. Note: most regulars have spots, but most of us are willing to mix it up. It just seems wrong when Wheezy isn’t in her spot. Wheezy hangs out with some other people who seem equally as great, but she gave me farm fresh eggs once for saving her spot, so obvs she’s my fav. There is Cowboy, as Britt called him, who reads a newspaper, has a wicked mustache, and always asks me how Brittany is doing and when she’s moving back (we both wish that would happen!) There’s the theologian who will talk your ear off if you let him, but he is SO full of wisdom, has crazy bed head, is always reading a book, and drinks iced coffee in a for here cup because he says it tastes better that way (I didn’t know that was a thing for cold coffee until I saw him doing it). There’s Monica the nurse who orders a different drink every day, is cute as a button, and always stops to talk. There are the groups of one day a week people who meet together to talk about the Bible. There’s the group of marathon running people who meet on Thursdays. There’s the sweet lady who orders a chocolate banana smoothie every other day. And then there are the crushes. Watch this music video before you proceed, because why not?

As you may have picked up on from previous posts, I’m prone to crushes. These aren’t the heart-shattering, obsessive kinds of crushes. These are the kinds of crushes that make life a little more fun. The kind where if they actually talked to you or asked you out you probably wouldn’t be interested anymore. The platonic, mysterious, you have a beard or a cute smile so I’m gonna like seeing you here types of crushes. I had a RA once who had the best philosophy on crushes. She believed that it was perfectly okay to have a crush at all the places you frequent. Gym crush. Caf crush. English comp crush. Starbucks crush. I think I’ve only had three Starbucks crushes. I won’t tell you about all of them, but I’ll tell you about the current because again, why not?? If my life was a RomCom (or a Taylor Swift song/parody or an early 2000s indie love song) this would be the beginning of an adorable meet-cute.

SBC (Starbucks Crush) is another early morning regular. I noticed him this summer because he had a great beard and glasses. Then I saw that he too drove a station wagon! Bearded and quirky are two of my must qualities, so duh. Linds and Anna sometimes end up at Starbucks in the mornings, so I had to tell them (and Sara) about his endearing qualities. Linds was determined to catch a glimpse, but kept missing him. The one day she got there on time HE HAD SHAVED THE BEARD DOWN TO A HIDEOUS MUSTACHE! I texted her, “ABORT MISSION. The beard is gone and the mustache is GROSS. No more SBC. Must find a new one.” And then he disappeared! He had an out of state licence plate, so I just decided he was here for the summer and had gone back home. Well, he’s back! He sits at the corner lighted table. I sit at the middle lighted table facing him (because I like to watch the sunrise, and he’s cute). He drinks simple, black, hot coffee. I drink simple, splash of milk, cold coffee. The mustache is gone, the beard hasn’t fully returned, but he still has the glasses and the quirky car and the ability to have a fierce beard, so I let him remain in his position as SBC. Our station wagons are sometimes friends, parked side by side, and have gotten way closer to actually talking than we likely ever will, but SBC is fun to look at, and I’m not sad about that. You know I like to add extra (clean) fun and sparkle to life in any way I can, and crushes do that. Who doesn’t love a few fluttering tummy butterflies and/or the occasional blushing moment when your friend is way too obviously trying to read what his name badge says (thanks Linds)? Note: SBC’s name is still unknown.

So now for that serious moment. Before my dad died, I really didn’t have consistent time with Jesus. I wrote two really long posts once about how hanging out at Starbucks with Jesus transformed my spiritual walk and led to captivated, intimate time with Him, which radically changed me in ways I never imagined. You can read those here and here. To borrow my own words,

“I was really good at believing I was capable of doing life in my own strength, with my own knowledge. When my dad died on November 18th, 2012, there was no strength or knowledge that I had to prepare me for that grief. In desperation, I told Jesus I’d actually try spending time with Him for two weeks, fully believing that even He couldn’t bring peace or healing to my grief. I gave a feeble attempt at an inch, and He pursued me back miles and miles.” 

I know “coffee and the word” is a Christian Instagram cliche. But the act of giving God my first fruits – the first part of my day, and learning to set a table for a date with Jesus, regardless of how cliche it is, is the main thing that reminds me of everything I need to remember. That I’m broken and fallen and sinful to my core. That without the Holy Spirit living in me, I’m wretched. Grief stripped away my ability to believe I could do life in my own strength. I can’t. I don’t want to. I need Jesus to sustain me. I need to read God’s word so I remember and cling to His promises. I need to spend time with Jesus so I am reminded of what He’s like so that through the power of the Holy Spirit, I can treat people and love people like He would. I need prayer so I can invite the Holy Spirit in to fight for me, guide me, convict me, and teach me. I will always be a Starbucks Lover because it’s where I meet with Jesus, it’s where I get gold stars, it’s where I do some of my best writings, and it’s where I’m reminded that the word neighbor of the “love your neighbors” command doesn’t fit into a neat little only next door people box.

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This is part of my 31 People(s) I Love series. I’ll be writing about 31 people/peoples that I adore! Click here if you would like a list of all the posts in this series.