Poetic Tuesday

A Self Portrait

There once was a girl who had a rather tragic beginning.
She was meant to be born when the leaves do their spinning.
Instead she was born on the very wrong day.
She was born in the very muggy month of May.

And some people think she was born in the wrong region,
For Asian she is not, and not Polish, nor Norwegian.
But her name is rather odd and rhymes with Asia.
And this is not where she’s from, this silly girl named Kasia.

She laughs like an old lady, emphysema-like and wheezy.
And the wiggling of toes makes her very uneasy.
A collector of odd things, like owls and super sticky post-its.
She organizes other people’s refrigerators and cabinets.

She likes to smile, but it usually make her cheeks hot.
The love of her friends, make her smile quite a lot.
A dreamer, procrastinator, silly, quirky, child of God, and friend,
The life she has been given, is not tragic at all, beginning, middle, or end.

Ha. Poetic Tuesday might not last long. Fun to try though.

Contemplative Monday

Or Serious Monday. Or some other similar word I haven’t thought of or discovered yet. And who knows, I may change my mind and not want to be serious. Or skip a week of being serious. Or two weeks. Or a month. The beauty of writing. I get to decide or not decide. Can you handle an indecisive mind that never stops thinking Mitch? (Note: Mitch is the blog’s name for anyone reading other than Mitch)

So currently Monday is serious/contemplative/introspective/pensive because Monday is the day I go to counseling. Lots of self awareness type thoughts take place on Mondays. Oh how I wish an hour of work went by as fast as an hour of counseling. Though usually the first five minutes go by at a work-like pace. But by the end of the hour my counselor is having to push me out of the door. I won’t go into all the gory messed up details of my brain, that’s what the counseling is for. But some things are worth saying to you, Mitch, and to friends, maybe some even to the world. Today I feel like talking about healing.

Of all the places to find wisdom, I know Grey’s Anatomy wouldn’t be a top choice for many, me included. But the season premier voice-overs (best part of every Grey’s episode) spoke some words that I felt…

Meredith: The dictionary defines grief as keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow. 
Little Grey: Grief may be a thing we all have in common, but it looks different on everyone.
McSteamy: It isn’t just death we have to grieve. It’s life. It’s loss. It’s change.
Alex: And when we wonder why it has to suck so much sometimes, has to hurt so bad. The thing we gotta try to remember is that it can turn on a dime.
Izzie: That’s how you stay alive. When it hurts so much you can’t breathe, that’s how you survive.
McDreamy: By remembering that one day, somehow, impossibly, you won’t feel this way. It won’t hurt this much.
Bailey: Grief comes in its own time for everyone, in its own way.
Owen: So the best we can do, the best anyone can do, is try for honesty.
Meredith: The really crappy thing, the very worst part of grief is that you can’t control it.
Arizona: The best we can do is try to let ourselves feel it when it comes.
Callie: And let it go when we can.
Meredith: The very worst part is that the minute you think you’re past it, it starts all over again.
Cristina: And always, every time, it takes your breath away.
Meredith: There are five stages of grief. They look different on all of us, but there are always five.
Alex: Denial.
Derek: Anger.
Bailey: Bargaining.
Little Grey: Depression.
Chief: Acceptance.

You may or may not have noticed that I seemingly disappeared off the face of the earth for almost a year. For all the inquisitive Nancy Drews out there, or Neds in your case Mitch, case solved. Reason for disappearance: healing and grief. Excuse? No. Not meant to be. If you care to know all the details, I’d love to sit down and have coffee with you, I have nothing to hide. Only a story God has given me and a history that makes me who I am, my present what it is, and my future what it will be, all meant to bring God glory. But I do not intend, tonight at least, to spill my guts. I’d just like to talk a little about healing and grief. A few things I’ve learned. And am still learning.

As written by the Grey’s Anatomy writers, and others I’m certain, death isn’t the only thing we grieve. Change… Life… Loss… Grief is kind enough to not show favoritism. Thank you grief. Ha. Joking aside though, yes it stinks, worse than a zoo, but it’s real, it hurts, but it has purpose.

Forrest Gump says life is like a box of chocolates. I’ve also heard life described as an onion. If you don’t like onions, bad analogy. I happen to like them, so it works for me. But like an onion, it’s really of no use or no good to anyone as is. It’s got all those squiggly, sprouty things on the ends, and those paper like coverings. And I guess if you’re boiling crawfish, maybe after removing the paperish coverings and squigglies it could be edible to a crazy drunk guy after boiled who likes to eat onions like apples. But onions are most of use when cut. When the layers are peeled away. And what happens when you cut and peel layers? Unless you know some secret I don’t… tears. And lots of them. I’d like to think the onion is grieving. But in the end, once cooked, after some painful heat, it adds flavor and tastes much sweeter.

As stated earlier, this things is huge. Enough to fill a book. I do not intend to write that book here. But I will add this. Don’t fight it. Don’t hide it. Don’t avoid it and think you can suppress it. Feel it when it comes. Deal with it. Because even if you think you beat it by not dealing with it, it’s still there. We are breakable humans. God didn’t make us unbreakable super humans for a reason. We bleed, we bruise, we feel pain. Why shouldn’t we let ourselves accept that our insides are the same? Beyond the organs and blood and vessels, those insides. We don’t deny the fact that if you stub your toe it hurts, if you cut your finger it bleeds, if you fall up the stairs (a skillful talent) you bruise. Life hurts, it cuts, it wounds, it bruises. Healing of the insides doesn’t happen if you pretend you don’t need it. Unfortunately we can’t just put band-aids on our hearts. It builds up and 26 years later culminates and forces you to peel the painful layers. Grief ends in acceptance. Not denial. Denial is a part of grief, but acceptance is the end. And I personally think the last stage is lifelong. Like a cool scar. A story to be told. And in the case of these life scars, a God’s glory scar.

Recipe Sunday

For some reason on Sunday’s I always feel like cooking. And I always prepare some meal on Sunday night to put in the crock pot on Monday morning. And today’s recipe is…

Glazed Pork Tenderloin and Sweet Potatoes
Amanda and her mom made a version of the pork tenderloin that was great! I didn’t have the recipe so I decided to searched recipezaar.com for a similar recipe and combined things from different ones I liked to come up with this on. 


* 3 lbs pork loin
* 4 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed (inch cubes)
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 1/4 teaspoon pepper 
* 1 cup apple juice or chicken broth
(For Glaze:)  
* 1 cup of preserves, I’m using strawberry
* 1/4 cup apple juice
* 2 teaspoons dried rosemary leaves, crumbled
* 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped

1. Preheat oven to 350°F.
2. Remove any excess fat from the roast.
3. Put potatoes in bottom of 13×9 baking dish sprayed with non stick cooking spray.
4. Rub the salt and pepper into the surface of the pork then brown each side in a pan.
5. After browning, deglaze the pan afterward with the broth or 1 cup of apple juice
6. Place pork on top of potatoes.
7. Pour broth or apple juice over all.
8. In a small saucepan, heat the preserves, apple juice, rosemary and garlic over medium heat, stirring frequently.
9. When thickened, spoon 1/4 cup mixture onto pork reserving remainder.
10. Insert meat thermometer so tip is in center of thickest part of pork.
11. Bake uncovered 1 hour 15 minutes to 1 hour 30 minutes or until the thermometer reads 155°F.
12. Cover pork with foil and allow to stand 15 to 20 minutes or until thermometer reads 160°F.
13. Cut roast into slices.
14. Heat the reserved preserves mixture and serve with roast.

Crock Pot:
1. Put potatoes in the crock pot.
2. Remove any excess fat from the roast.
4. Rub the salt and pepper into the surface of the pork then brown each side in a pan.
5. After browning, deglaze the pan afterward with the 1 cup or less of apple juice or broth.
6. Place pork on top of potatoes.
7. Pour broth or apple juice over all.
8. In a small saucepan, heat the preserves, apple juice, rosemary and garlic over medium heat, stirring frequently.
9. When thickened, spoon 1/4 – 1/2 cup mixture onto pork reserving remainder.
10. Cover and cook on low for 4-6 hours on high or 8-10 on low.
11. Cut roast into slices.
12. Heat the reserved preserves mixture and serve with roast.

I also wanted to bake something so I made some mini muffins.

Oatmeal Streusel Muffins
This recipe is from the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook on page 126 in the breads section.


*1 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
*3/4 cup of rolled oats
*1/3 cup sugar
*2 teaspoons baking powder
*1/4 teaspoon salt
*1 egg, beaten
*3/4 cup milk
*1/4 cup cooking oil or apple sauce
(For Streusel Topping:)
*2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
*1 tablespoon rolled oats
*3 tablespoons packed brown sugar
*1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
*2 tablespoons butter
*2 tablespoons chopped pecans or walnuts


1. Make streusel topping and set aside. (Mix flour, oats, brown sugar, and cinnamon in small bowl. Cut in 2 tbsp of butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Can stir in two tbsp of chopped pecans or walnuts if desired.)
2. Preheat over to 400. Grease muffin tin and set aside. In a medium bowl combine flour, sugar, oats, baking powder, and salt. Make a well in center of flour mixture, set aside.
3. In another bowl, combine egg, milk, and oil (or applesauce). Add egg mixture all at once to the flour mixture. Stir just until moistened. (Note: Batter should be lumpy. Stir with a wooden spoon just until the ingredients are moistened. Do not overmix or the muffins will be peaked and have tunnels and a tough texture.)
4. Spoon batter into muffin tin, filling each two-thirds full (makes 12 standard muffins, 24 minis, or 6 jumbo). Sprinkle streusel topping over muffin batter in cups. Bake for 18-20 minutes for standard muffins or 10-12 for mini muffins (30 at 350 for jumbo) until golden brown or toothpick comes out clean. Cool muffins on a wire rack for 5 minutes. Serve warm.

And for dinner I ate a gourmet classic, grilled ham and cheese ha.

I’m thinking if I come up with a theme for every day I will blog more. Not that I have to blog more, but I like writing. It’s a good creative outlet for me. Recipe Sunday, Contemplative Monday, Poetic Tuesday, Quotable Wednesday, Question and Answer Thursday. There we go.